They Had Them
by Rayniekinnz
Summary: 'Remus wasn't ashamed, not of his first love or his very much current one. After all, Lucius Malfoy had /great/ hair. He just so happened to prefer Black.' Established WolfStar. Slight AU. Competitions/Challenges listed inside. Beta'd by firefly81!


**They Had Them**

"So, Remus, who was your first love?" Lily asked, leaning forwards. "At Hogwarts. I mean, that's where everyone finds theirs, right?"

"My first love?" he asked, stalling. A frown tugged down at his lips, eyebrows drawing together when he saw how eager Sirius and James seemed to be for his answer.

"Yeah!" James replied. "See, Alice and Frank talked about it at their wedding when they did their vows – you had to go lie down, I think, so you missed most of it – and now everyone's been talking about it. So. Who was yours? Obviously, Lily was mine, and Padfoot was such a whore back then that we'd be surprised if he even knows what the word means—"

"_Hey_!"

"—so that leaves you. Who was the lucky girl, huh?"

"I was not a whore!" Sirius protested loudly, taking the spotlight off his best friend for the moment. "I was just – _passionate_."

"Yeah, about non-commitment," James snorted. "Those poor women…I think they all had a bit of a cry when you decided to go stag for the pre-Graduation Ball."

"Yeah, whatever you say, Cinderella."

"What is that supposed to mean?!" James demanded, before turning to his wife accusingly. "Lils, _this_ is what happens when you try to bring muggle stuff into Game Night!"

"Would you two shut up!" Lily said, elbowing her husband and shooting Sirius a glare. "I, _for one,_ would like to hear Remus' answer, please!"

Remus sighed, shifting uncomfortably as three sets of eyes were suddenly pinned to him, one set vaguely troubled and the other two expectant. He licked a bit of vanilla ice-cream from his spoon before dipping it into the strawberry section, shrugging. "It was Malfoy, of course. I mean…have you seen that hair?"

There was a moment of shocked silence before James burst into laughter and Lily followed suit, Sirius' nervous chuckles joining in not long after. They locked eyes and Sirius relaxed, able to make his expression more convincing before James could comment.

"No need to ask about Lily's," Remus said lightly, steering the conversation away from himself. "I think we all know the answer."

"Oh yeah," Sirius chimed in, not missing a beat, "as questionable as it is. Slughorn? Really, Lily? _Really_?"

If James or Lily noticed how the silences weren't so enthusiastically filled after that, when the laughter and mock-indignant protests died down, neither said anything.

* * *

><p>They all went their separate ways a few hours later, though Remus wasn't the least bit surprised to find Sirius waiting for him when he got home. He had taken a detour to the store, groceries dangling from his left hand as he dug his keys out of his pocket with the other.<p>

"Coffee?" he asked, toeing off his shoes in the entrance and walking towards the kitchen. He had a small flat, basically a bedroom, bathroom, and a small open area that he used for everything else, but it was only temporary so he wasn't all that bothered about the space – or lack there-of.

"Do you have any lager?"

"Might still be some from the other day," Remus said, unpacking everything he had bought. Sirius deliberately went the long way around the counter, patting his hip and pressing a kiss to his jaw as he passed.

He got a bottle from the fridge – Butterbeer; James must have taken the last of the lager with him – and left the door open, seeing the milk and other perishables. Remus nodded a vague thanks, putting everything away before grabbing a bottle of his own and gesturing towards the couch.

Sirius plopped down first, putting his feet up on the coffee table and patting the space beside him. Remus obliged, rolling his eyes fondly when a head full of hair dropped down on his shoulder, tickling his neck.

They sat like that for a good ten minutes before either felt the need to speak, just relaxing and enjoying each other's company; the Wireless buzzing in the background.

"I think they forget, sometimes," Sirius broke the silence, voice uncharacteristically quiet.

Remus said nothing, finally popping the cap off his Butterbeer and bringing it to his lips, combing the fingers of his free hand through dark hair. It was getting long, reaching past broad shoulders.

"But I don't," he continued, voice no louder than a whisper. "I don't think I can ever forget, Moony. I…they say things like that, not even thinking about it."

"You know they didn't mean any harm by it," Remus reminded gently. "And it's not a matter of just forgetting; they can hardly speak about it freely as it is."

"But they should be able to!" Sirius insisted, sitting up but not moving away. He set his drink down, expression tight with repressed emotion. "They should be able to joke about it and toss it into the conversation like we do about them, we should be able to talk about it without it getting all weird, we should be able to—"

"Should and could are very different things, Sirius. But it's not just about that, is it?"

He scoffed, turning his face away. "I don't know how you can take this all so calmly. Doesn't it bother you, knowing that we can't even share our relationship with our _best friends_? That we have to act as if we're _ashamed_?"

"Don't even try and make this about me, now," Remus said warningly, before softening his voice. "Sirius, the fact that they support us is enough. If it slips their minds every now and then, isn't that a compliment? That we're so close, so "normal", that they don't even have to make distinctions? Yes, James can be an insensitive arse, but you can't blame him – or Lily – for trying to keep it under the radar. _You know_ what happens."

Sirius stared at him defiantly, lips pressed together angrily, but deflated after a moment. He pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing in deeply and letting out a shuddering breath.

Remus scooted forward and dragged him against his chest, arm looping around his shoulders. Sirius buried his face in his neck, making half-hearted protests – "not a kid" and "if you don't stop cooing I'm going to pinch your balls" – but not even attempting to move. It was an awkward position and it probably looked absolutely ridiculous, but they stayed like that for a long while, shifting every now and then to get more comfortable.

Eventually, Sirius slid off Remus' lap and took up his original seat beside him, playing with the buttons on his shirt as he lay his head against Remus' shoulder again. He may or may not have been unabashedly molesting his chest too.

"You know, they say first loves never amount to anything…" Sirius murmured a little bit later.

"I'm not surprised, really. Malfoy and I would have made a terrible couple," Remus replied simply.

Sirius' head snapped up, eyes widening as his jaw dropped. "You mean…you were _serious_ about that?!"

"Of course," Remus scoffed. "Um, hello, _his hair_? And I was twelve. He was every fairytale prince I had ever heard about, minus the feel-good ending."

"Well, fuck me," Sirius said after a moment of merely flapping his mouth, blinking owlishly.

"Gladly. Bedroom, shower, kitchen floor? Or maybe even right here, on this very couch?" Remus sipped his Butterbeer, hiding a smile.

"…"

"Is that a no? What a shame."

A slow, mischievous grin spread across his lips. "I love you so much," Sirius whispered, before grabbing Remus' chin and claiming his lips in a searing kiss.

"I know," he replied when he had his breath back, tilting his chin upwards to look up from beneath his lashes. "I just so happen to fancy you, too."

**Finis**.

* * *

><p><strong>The Romance Survival Competition! <strong>Round 1 – Write about WolfStar or Sirius Black and Remus Lupin

**Ascend-The-Ladder Competition!** Round 2 – 3) Your character's first love at Hogwarts

**The Amateur Divination Game Challenge! **Round 2 – **Q:** What is your favourite ice-cream flavour? **A**: Vanilla [I got it wrong, whoops]


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